Where did Curious Chat go?
Where did Curious Chat go?
What’s been occupying my brain during an unexpected month-long hiatus
In the past month, I couldn’t find the tiniest speckle of brain space to think about this newsletter, let alone write it.
After returning to Paris, I had some major matters to sort out—like finding a new long-term home and furnishing it, securing healthcare, and trying not to get kicked out of the country by starting my visa renewal process. All these things came with tight deadlines, more paperwork than you could imagine, and, naturally, loads of French vocabulary I still barely know. That meant less-essential matters, like this Substack, got pushed to the sidelines—not unlike my organs that are currently being squished by an apparently “very grand bébé.”
Now, sitting in my new apartment, with my Carte Vitale on its way and a wonderful immigration lawyer putting together my dossier for my visa renewal, a little space in my brain’s hard drive has opened up so I can think about this Substack. Will it be back every week? I hope so, but I’m not making any promises. Besides, a recent study found that “pregnancy brain” is a real thing, which means my brain could very well become muffled and overfilled again at any moment.
For this newsletter, a few thoughts I’ve had over the past few weeks:
Everyone’s home decor is boring
Our homes look the same: White walls, beige furniture, wooden touches, brass accents. It’s understandable why: We lean towards a safe and classic colour scheme so that any accents we choose go together seamlessly—and we can be thought of by our peers as having good taste. At the same time, however, we’re all eagerly double-tapping the Instagram pictures of homes featured on Architectural Digest, dipped in colours, steeped in originality.
Hey, I’m no better—in my new apartment, there’s a gorgeous marble fireplace with shelves on either side painted navy. Why navy?! My immediate thought was I’d have to paint them beige or white. Then I caught myself. Those colours are safe, predictable, boring. (And also, I don’t seem to be allowed to paint the shelves.) So I’m embracing these damn navy things. And getting a pink sofa! Beige is bullshit. (Except when it comes to clothing. Boy, do I love dressing like a tall cappuccino or butter croissant.)
On forever having single girl brain (and maybe being a tiny bit cynical)
In one month I went from being single to engaged and pregnant, but after 36 years, my brain proves to be stuck in single status with no hardware upgrades available. Translation: The little bit of cynicism you get from being single for so long doesn’t disappear when your relationship status changes.
Let me explain: Bride culture and mom culture are not resonating with me. For example, I see right through the weird little traditions we make our male partners do. Like bridal showers, when we expect him to arrive at the end of the gathering with a bouquet. Here’s the problem: We all know he was told to bring it. And not only that, but we know he was told which flowers to choose, which colour theme to go with, and even where to get the blooms, just so the woman’s friends and family believe he has good taste, can follow directions, and will therefore be a good husband.
Another example: I shudder when I hear the little labels moms call themselves and other moms. Boy mom. Beige mom. Almond mom. I shudder because of their underlying subtext: To prove to the world they’re okay with having just boys or just girls. Or to judge other moms for disliking the Crayola-bright hues of kids’ clothing or having debatably unhealthy perceptions of nutrition. Here’s hoping the idea of maman beige does not exist in France.
The unrealistic issue with Nobody Wants This that no one’s talking about—except me and my sister
We all agree: It’s a fun, well-written show, and they don’t make actors like Adam Brody anymore. Here’s the issue: The show’s leading sisters, Joanne and Morgan, never think about money. This is not normal. They’re single and living alone, and their only source of income is their weekly podcast. Yet they never mention money. Not when they’re sitting in their individual 2.5 million dollar LA homes fully furnished with Jenni Kayne goods (probably), and not when they’re ignoring work emails about doing a live event that would earn them a lot more money. Could they be making a killing from their podcast? Sure! But for that, they’d have to be influencers/journalists/actors-turned-podcasters, like the Foster sisters (the show writer and show producer) themselves.
Now, this is something I instantly noticed as someone who thinks about money 45-90% of the time, depending on whether my freelance career is in feast or famine mode. While it’s clear why money isn’t an issue on the show (writer Erin Foster, daughter of multi-millionaire David Foster, has never been truly stressed about money), it’s a missed opportunity. Money woes are relatable and make characters more likable. Plus, they can lead to fun plot points (think: Rachel Green needing a pay-advance to visit her family for the holidays, or Carrie Bradshaw needing help from her friends to buy her apartment from belly-rubbing Aiden.) Nevertheless, I admit it’s a bit pleasant to get absorbed in a life where money woes are blissfully non-existent.
The most embarrassing, regrettable purchase I made this year
I don’t know why I did it. Was I so insecure that I needed to buy a pair of shoes that literally every third woman under 50 in the world is wearing? You know what I’m talking about: The Adidas Spezials. I still wear them because they’re warm and comfortable, and I’m too cheap to buy a new pair when I need to buy a thousand things for my apartment and baby. But I feel like an idiot every time I wear them.
Move over avocados—millennials are all about cheese now
Today is Thanksgiving Sunday in Canada, which means millennial women are getting ready to publish their ~gRaTeFuL~ posts. You’re familiar: It’s the rare time of year when everyone you went to high school with posts pictures of their family to share how happy they are that they’re a mama/wifey. These posts are not to be confused with other family-focused tributes for events like Valentine’s Day, Christmas, New Year’s, wedding anniversaries, spousal birthdays, kids’ birthdays Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Son/Daughter Appreciation Day, or first day/last day school pictures.
I mean, it’s nice! It’s nice you’re happy and you like your life and you want to share it with us, your tapping-fatigued followers, every 6-8 weeks. But when did we, millennials, the once cool gen, become so cheesy? Gen Zs would never.
Listen, I’m just poking fun. And I certainly post my own version of cheese (I feel a slew of belly shots coming out soon). Plus, there’s a very good chance I’ll be doing the same thing when I’m a wife and mom because I’m so excited to marry my partner and have a baby. But right now? I’m just grateful to have a dryer.
Until next time,
Renée
P.S. I’ve inherited an eaux de mildew scent in my new apartment, due to the washing machine and aforementioned dryer being tucked away in a cupboard with no proper ventilation. I welcome any tips for getting rid of the smell. (Have already tried vinegar, bleach, baking soda, and cute little lavender sachets.)